March 2010
metanoiamuseum asked: Who is Wesley Carls? Is it a pseudonym of sorts?
Pavement, Starlings of the Slipstream
February 2010
“I want to start a doggie themed night club where people are encouraged to put...”
– Tony
whatcriscilikes asked: Who do you attribute your grasp on the english language to?
natashavc asked: When will you get your ass to the welfare?
Anonymous asked: What would you say to the gay guys with crushes on you?
All moved in.
Feeling pretty topps right now. Super huge thank you to Duncan for giving me his mattress and helping us move today. That guy is a solid dude.
I’m beat.
This has something to do with this. →
6od:
The other night, Alan, Tony and I drunkenly made statements, which I typed into an iPhone. I let the iPhone do all the auto-corrections it felt necessary. I felt like it was one of those flaws that makes something more beautiful and gave it much more meaning. Tony took a screenshot of our masterpiece and I have transcribed it:
Did you guts ever seed that Helen Kelley movie? I’m poetry...
1 tag
Atom & His Package, Possession (Not The One By...
drinkyourjuice asked: I HOPE YOUR JOB INTERVIEW WENT WELL AND THAT NOW YOU ARE DOING DRUGS AND WATCHING VERONICA MARS AND BEING LIKE, "YEAH, NO BIG DEAL." IM SO PROUD OF YOU TODAY AND EVERY DAY, GROWING BOY!
2 tags
I wonder
how many times a day I mutter ‘fucking retard’ under my breath and slightly shake my head side to side. Either about myself or others.
1 tag
If you can make as much money selling leather jackets as you can selling handguns, you should face the same penalties.
“Congressman Mark Kirk, a Republican member of the House of Representatives from...”
– This is one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever heard. Kirk, put down the kush before you Represent.
Girls are so pretty.
“Poptarts make me vomit. They are a passionless food.”
– My sister.
hmwt:
Put down your laptop and do something on paper. Have an actual conversation without whipping out your mobile device. Host an actual party where there is not one “professional” photographer present to snap your good side. Live you fucking life, not your blog. You are depressing the fuck out of me, friends.
I live my life plenty.
edit: you guys bounced out! unfollowed me! because I enjoy...
I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW TODAY AND I'M NERVOUS...
1 tag
But when you were available I was drinking Colt .45s with Lando, we were hanging out at the cantina on Mos Eisley.
to do list.
juliannacaro:
prefix: x get hella faded, bro 1. x go to history and philosophy 2. x take test 3. x visit alan 4. x anaheim hooters, nigga 5. weed city 6. do the same thing we do everynight, plan to take over the world
I was never visited, you wench.
Midomi →
This is pretty old, but, fuck me. Go sing a song, and see if recognizes it. But the best part is when they play it back with all the other user submitted versions. And they’re horrible. And amazing. Do Party In The USA. Tony just did. It’s worth it.
1 tag
“Hey you guys, remember when everyone liked Wolfmother? What’s wrong with...”
– I love this man.
“I’m not gonna shower. I’m just gonna drink this beer.”
– Tony doesn’t shower-beer.
1 tag
HOW MANY LIVESTRONG BRACELETS MUST I OWN BEFORE...
Do you ever find yourself making up some painfully specific degenerate character and living as if you were him? For like, you know, an hour or so?
fantastical creature update
Me: Hi. I'm wearing most of my same clothes from yesterday.
Alan: I'm wearing all of my same clothes from yesterday.
where
are all of you new followers coming from?
you’re stoned aren’t you?
1 tag
Shit, Lilly Scott. What you gonna do to me?
Also: Katelyn Epperly!
blueeyeddevil:
Marnie Stern, “Logical Volume”
...
1 tag
2:33: High five bro! You didn’t use a condom... →
Passengers* unloading from Judging Alan about his Ego, also known as Terminal B**, please exit TO THE LEFT***.
So yeah, someone reblogged this and I re-read it and I’m totally laughing at my own joke right now. Whatever. This line slayed me.
*haters **my jock ***TO THE LEFT
1 tag
Ted Leo + Pharmacists, Parallel or Together?
...
thiswontlastlong-deactivated201 asked: Are you going tonight? I am and I'm nervous about meeting some of tumblr peeps IRL. I'm sweating just thinking about it. I'll be the one arriving drunk.
