1. I just LOVE ~*^mah gayz!^*~ Girl
This girl treats most guys, regardless of sexuality, like collectible items.
2. Still Owns All Her Stuffed Animals Girl
It’s just…it’s weird. Don’t look at me, teddy bear, as I undress…
3. Drum Circle Girl
Nobody wants Devil Sticks brought out in the bedroom.
4. Still Has An Audrey Hepburn Poster Above Her Bed Girl
We’re not freshmen in a musical theater program anymore, everyone!
5. I Can’t Help It That I Don’t Get Along With Girls! Girl
You’ll convince yourself that Community College Tim Riggins in the blue hat is referencing an actual sex act he’s done with her with every miniscule joke he makes. And guess what. He is.
6. Girl’s Night Out! Girl
Late night car rides with lots of crying and vomit and missing heels.
7. ‘Ironically’ Loves One Direction Girl
Is probably 14. See also: Jepfriends, Beliebers, etc.
8. Never Buys Condoms Girl
Advanced ladies gotta hold down some rubbers, too.
9. Cosmo Subscriber Girl
There are like, MAYBE, six ways to please your man. Here’s a short list: sex.
10. Hates Beer Girl
I can not order you a cosmo at Dodger’s Stadium. I will not.
11. Bottle Service Girl
You don’t drive a Rolls, do you?
12. I Didn’t Get Your Text Until Now Girl
She’s always on her phone though!
13. Fashion Blogger Girl
Hassle and a half that you’re not good enough for (unless you’re a male model).
Alright, I got to thirteen and gave up. You know why? Girls rule. Boys drool. Whatever. Date ‘em, dude. Date ‘em all.
Bonus Catwoman Lightning Round Wrap-Up:
(ps- 14. Aspiring Actress Girl)